I wanted to start off this post with a deep, somewhat poetic statement. I mean, that's probably one of the best techniques of blogging come-backs, right? Then I realized that all I really wanted was to write something that helped me let it all out; something that wouldn't be graded, marked, or commented upon by a teacher, examiner or anyone with the capability of altering my future grade in some way.
A lot has been going on recently--but then again, when has it not? 2011 has been one hell of a year, and honestly, I wouldn't erase a single moment. Except maybe the pain, suffering and death some people had to endure, but even that went a long way towards helping the world shake off its drowsiness and get up out of bed once and for all.
To me, things will never be the same. Deep inside, I know I learned a lot of things, and although it would be much more impressive to list them in a philosophical paragraph, I don't really know what they are. Besides, I haven't stopped learning. I mean, I've changed in a lot of ways, and not all of them are for the better. But I'm trying, and I'll keep on trying, and maybe some day I'll find myself on a road that can take me there.
Friends. *le sigh* That's some funny business, isn't it? All of a sudden, you love someone who used to piss you off like crazy, and you stop trusting the people you thought you couldn't live without. It's not about some great betrayal (I wish it were, that'd make things a whole lot easier), it's about the small things, the little things people do and think we don't notice (or maybe they just don't care if we do). Friendship isn't about abusing people; sure, you sometimes take more than you give, and sometimes it's the other way around, but there's always got to be balance. And you'd think, after 8 years, the people "closest" to you would know what that balance was.
The future's coming. Stupid, I know, but that's how I feel. In two years I'll be in college, and the decisions I make right now have a huge effect on where I'll be then. Scary. Like I needed more reasons to stress out. I'm perfectly capable of doing that over mundane, day-to-day things. Which brings me to the next issue: my poor, fragile heart. No, I'm not talking about some sappy unrequited love (that's actually pretty funny), I'm talking about the fact that I'm pretty sure that I'm going to end up with a cardiological ailment some day, owing to stress and spending 80% of my time being pissed off.
You're probably wondering what the point of this post is (I would be, too). There is no point. Sometimes, things don't have a point, or at least it's one we can't see. They happen, and maybe later, if we're lucky, we get hit by a movie-like epiphany (looking off musingly into the distance and crying, "BAZINGA!" are required) and realize why they did, but for now, I don't know. And I'm guessing neither do you.
A lot has been going on recently--but then again, when has it not? 2011 has been one hell of a year, and honestly, I wouldn't erase a single moment. Except maybe the pain, suffering and death some people had to endure, but even that went a long way towards helping the world shake off its drowsiness and get up out of bed once and for all.
To me, things will never be the same. Deep inside, I know I learned a lot of things, and although it would be much more impressive to list them in a philosophical paragraph, I don't really know what they are. Besides, I haven't stopped learning. I mean, I've changed in a lot of ways, and not all of them are for the better. But I'm trying, and I'll keep on trying, and maybe some day I'll find myself on a road that can take me there.
Friends. *le sigh* That's some funny business, isn't it? All of a sudden, you love someone who used to piss you off like crazy, and you stop trusting the people you thought you couldn't live without. It's not about some great betrayal (I wish it were, that'd make things a whole lot easier), it's about the small things, the little things people do and think we don't notice (or maybe they just don't care if we do). Friendship isn't about abusing people; sure, you sometimes take more than you give, and sometimes it's the other way around, but there's always got to be balance. And you'd think, after 8 years, the people "closest" to you would know what that balance was.
The future's coming. Stupid, I know, but that's how I feel. In two years I'll be in college, and the decisions I make right now have a huge effect on where I'll be then. Scary. Like I needed more reasons to stress out. I'm perfectly capable of doing that over mundane, day-to-day things. Which brings me to the next issue: my poor, fragile heart. No, I'm not talking about some sappy unrequited love (that's actually pretty funny), I'm talking about the fact that I'm pretty sure that I'm going to end up with a cardiological ailment some day, owing to stress and spending 80% of my time being pissed off.
You're probably wondering what the point of this post is (I would be, too). There is no point. Sometimes, things don't have a point, or at least it's one we can't see. They happen, and maybe later, if we're lucky, we get hit by a movie-like epiphany (looking off musingly into the distance and crying, "BAZINGA!" are required) and realize why they did, but for now, I don't know. And I'm guessing neither do you.
No comments:
Post a Comment