First, let me specify what I mean by that. Of course like all human beings, I want to love and feel loved and all that jazz, but I'm not sure that feeling of completely and utterly helpless love exists. It might be more like, "Hey, I could spend the rest of my life with this dude." That, I understand. And maybe in all those soppy love stories, that plus some kind of adversity (family feuds, money, popularity, sudden disasters, moving house...be it what it may) is what makes this feeling so magnified. We all know we want what we can't have. We love the chase, the climb (yes, I'm quoting Miley Cyrus here), but once we 'get there', we don't know what to do. That's because we can't understand that life is a journey and the climb never ends.
Back to what we were talking about. Teenage crushes. In my opinion, they're just crushes (NOTE: not love) that are created mainly as a result of:
-Hormones.
-The aforementioned desire to love and feel loved.
-Peer pressure. Well, not EXACTLY peer pressure, but seeing a lot of your friends 'in love' or whatever makes you feel left out.
-The state of confusion that all teenagers are naturally in.
A teenager WANTS to crush. I don't think it's a feeling you can't help. Either you or your subconscious is behind it. Isn't the fact that most teenage relationships end in failure enough to satisfy my point?
To sum up, I don't believe in teenage relationships. In fact, I don't even believe in 'relationships' or 'dating' at all. Maybe at a certain age you will find someone you feel comfortable with, and as time goes on you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with them; maybe not. The point is, why make ourselves live all this pointless, unnecessary drama?
I do believe that they are just crushes. As a teenager you're probably still trying to figure out what to do with your life, I don't think teenagers are mature enough to choose life-partners :D. And I don't believe in relationships or dating because I don't want to swap boyfriends untill I accidently stumble across the one and by then I'd have used up all my emotional supply. It just doesn't make sense to me :D
ReplyDeleteBeing someone who once swore off teenage dating and is now caught agonizing over whether or not to be with her ex again, I will attest that teenage love does exist. I don't think I would have had the strength to keep continuing on with him like this,especially with so much criticism from my peers, if I did not truly care about him. Yes, I like the idea of having a relationship, but I would not have one at the cost of my happiness, whether or not all of my friends are dating (they're not). I think that you're still kinda young, so be forewarned that you might change your mind in a heartbeat- I did!
ReplyDeleteI must admit, sometimes I'd rather people did not have to go through the heartbreaking dating thing to find happiness though :/
By the way...love the new design!!
Nada, I completely agree! It could be that we as teenagers WANT to crush, we crave the feeling of having someone out there in the world who's 'ours', not to mention that most of us (despite what we say) like the drama that takes us away from the boredom of our lives. But like you said, I think it's pointless to waste all your emotional supply on something that will most probably amount to nothing. :D
ReplyDeleteLindz, I don't know. You might be right about the being young thing (we all change our minds!), but I'm still convinced that in your teen years (especially in the -18 range), a relationship that will last is very rare. As teenagers, we have so many choices and decisions to make regarding schools and colleges, parents, friends...not to mention the inner 'angst' we go through! :D It just doesn't seem likely to me that at that an age when you're so confused, you can pick someone to spend the rest of your life with.
And thank you so much!! :)
Well to start off I'm not a teenager :D and it's true you might change your mind. There were times when I wanted a relationship it's only natural It depends on your point of view and what you want in your life. And I agree with you at 18 you'reprobably not mature enough to make thatkind of important decisions :) after allyou might change your mind later. Furthermore,I'd never agree on just about any relationship, if you are going to be in a relationship you should be in a good rewarding one. One that gives you happiness,comfort and support :D
ReplyDeleteExactly, and like I said, a lot of teenage relationships are initiated because both parties just want to be in a relationship! Isn't that pointless, to date for the sake of dating? I mean, isn't the point of HAVING a partner that you pick someone to spend the rest of your life with? What is the point of wasting your time on relationships that you know will amount to nothing?
ReplyDeleteThere are exceptions of course; people who met in high school and eventually got married and such, but I just don't feel good about teenage relationships, I don't really approve of them or feel like they coincide with my religious beliefs.
When I really think about it, it'd probably be better if people didn't date until at least college (my mom would be happy with after college :D), but once you get into it and get emotionally involved, you're kind of stuck.
ReplyDeleteNada...I think the best thing about dating in high school is just trying to find out what you want in a partner, not accidently finding the right one. What happens happens is how I see it. I don't know if you use up your emotional supply, but I've only been with one guy, so how should I know? :) Of course, I'm an un-levelheaded, emotional, hopeless romantic myself, so disregard anything I say if you feel the need! :)
Well, during college you are a little more mature and you're supposedly "starting your life" and all that, so it makes more sense than high school! :D
ReplyDeleteWell @ Lindz : Actually I'm a hopeless romantic myslef. It has nothing to do with romance or so I think :). It has to do withwho you are and You don't have to be in a relationship to figure out what you want of course. I totally agree that it is a big part of our lives and a very important one too but I don't believe that as a teenager "relationships" should be on the top of your list :D. The idea of love is highly appealing I know and I agree with all my heart. It's just , personally I don't believe that it should happen untill it's the right time and person and untill you're ready to handle being in one. It's not always rainbows and butterflies :D.Love without thinking is not right. That's how I see it :D:D
ReplyDeleteWell, I want to make things clear.
ReplyDeleteTeen love DOES exist, but I don't believe in teen relationships.
Why does teen love exist? Because teens are humans as well - some 'crushes' do develop to sth deeper (hence the marriage between 16 and 14 year-olds about, what? 1400 years ago?)
But teen relationships, ESPECIALLY nowadays, are utterly, completely and TOTALLY pointless - says a hopeless romantic teenager.
Mariam, if you'll read not my last comment, but the one before that, you'll find that I said:
ReplyDelete"Exactly, and like I said, a lot of teenage relationships are initiated because both parties just want to be in a relationship! Isn't that pointless, to date for the sake of dating? I mean, isn't the point of HAVING a partner that you pick someone to spend the rest of your life with? What is the point of wasting your time on relationships that you know will amount to nothing?
There are exceptions of course; people who met in high school and eventually got married and such, but I just don't feel good about teenage relationships, I don't really approve of them or feel like they coincide with my religious beliefs."
So basically, high five to you!
And about the being a romantic issue, seeing so many POINTLESS relationships where both parties claim they are '100%, beyond any reasonable doubt IN LOVE' kind of turns off any romantic spark in me.
I hate to keep posting, but I guess the truth is-and maybe I'm a complete fool for saying this, I don't really know-is that it is so different with me and my boyfriend. We're both really emotional and heavy thinkers, and of course there's the fact that we go to a kind of weird school :) And I'm not really sure how you can know in advance where a relationship will lead. Of course, I also come from a family of people who stayed with their high school sweethearts. So I don't really know :/
ReplyDelete